We (we meaning me) will soon be launching our metal hat business here on the Internet (sales are limited only to the upper half of Indiana), assuming the Internet is still going for the next few weeks. This will allow you, the general pubic, to buy this healthy alternative to walking around without protection for your head.
We purchased a franchise from a man in Chicago that was selling watches from the trunk of his car. He said he had entrepreneurial, which is something we never heard of and assume it to be a disease. We didn't wat to pry.
In any event, we now have the rights to this new technology.
The guy selling this valuable franchise explained that scientists continue to find that the human brain is a complex electrical mechanism. The synapses in your head are like tiny spark plugs that fire electrical signals. This is a well known scientific fact, which everyone knows. Well maybe you didn’t know it, but everyone else knows it which is why we can say it is “well known”.
When you sit at home and watch broadcast TV. The same signal that is going into your television is passing through your body and affecting your brain. The effect is only very slight and you likely don’t notice it. But there are hundreds of channels of satellite TV being beamed at your neighbors TV. Your neighbor who never invites you over to watch football has that NFL package that was created by some SOB which prohibits you from seeing some games because only the NFL satellite gets it… but we digress.
There are hundreds and hundreds of TV signals going into your body. There are also about a hundred GPS signals to people who get lost a lot. There are radio stations broadcasting signals into your body these are both broadcast and satellite radio waves. And there are the many miscellaneous signals from “Wi Fi” in your house, garage door openers that your neighbors set off without any notice being given to you, TV remote controls that appear innocent enough, just to mention a few.
All of these electrical waves are having an effect on your brain. Your body could tolerate any one of these signals, but all of them added together and compounded result in harm to your brain. This is why you feel “funny” sometimes. (Funny as in strange, not funny as in you laugh all the time. Maybe you do laugh all the time, but that is not what we are talking about here.)
The guy selling the watches said this is why when you stand up real quickly after laying on the couch eating potato chips and watching TV you sometimes feel faint. (I always wondered what caused that.) The guy selling watches explained that when you eat ice cream really fast it interferes with the electronic waves from the air and it can make your head hurt. (I always wondered what caused that.) And he explained this is why people have so many headaches.
Apparently sometimes when we have what we think is the flue it is really “Radio Wave Poisoning”.
Our metal hats will protect your brain by blocking out all of these electrical signals and allow your brain to function as your creator intended.
It also develops you neck muscles.
Please do not email us asking us to give you preferential treatment. Just place your orders and wait your turn. We are sure you will want a metal hat immediately if not sooner.
Please be patient.
images are available at www.davidarment.photos
©David L Arment